Santa banta jokes in Hindi and English

Here is a collection of Santa Banta Funny Jokes is Hindi and English, You can read and share these messages to your friends and family member on Facebook, Google plus, twitter, stumble upon etc.

Santa banta jokes in Hindi and English 

Santa apni khubsoorat Bibi ke saath car main betha.
Driver nay sheesha set kiya.
Santa gusse min bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai, piche beth, car main chalaoon ga!

• Santa apni khubsoorat Bibi ke saath car main betha.
  Driver nay sheesha set kiya.
  Santa gusse min bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai, piche beth, car main chalaoon ga!

• Salesman : Which Soap you Use ? ?
  Santa    : Baba�s Soap, baba�s Paste, baba�S Brush.
  Salesman : Is baba�s An "INTERNATIONAL" Company ?
  SAnta    : Baba Is My Room Mate

• Santa were traveling first time in plane going to "BOMBAY",
  while landing, he cried out : "BOMBAY-BOMBAY",
  
  air hostess : " B-silent plzzzzz ",
  santa said : " OMBAY - OMBAY!s!!!!!!! "

• *pukha kutta*
  0nce there was a pukha kutta,
  He was very pukha,
  He pheering loor loor,
  He dekhya the shop of chaacha feeeeka,
  He chuked one botti from there,
  & nassed away speeeeto speeeeto,
  Jub he guzra from naale Aaale pul to,
  He saw one hor kutta,
  He become very shoda,
  His soch was kutyaaan waali,
  He challaang lagai in da ganda naala for khiching botti from duja kuta,
  But his apni boti v paani vich diging
  MORAL:-
  �Improve ur English�:-):p

• Santa was draw out money frm ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen your
  password. It�s ******. Sant: you r wrong. It�s 153970.

• Santa walks into a library and says, "Can I have a sandwich & coke?" Librarian, "I am sorry, this is a library." Santa speaks, "Can I have a burger and fries? ?"

• Santa Suffering from cold was shivering. His son called a doc.
  Doc: what's happened ? ?
  Son: Bimaari da ta pata nahi par baaapu saver da VIBRATION mode te lagaaya hai.

• Santa: Itne kum marks? Do thappad maarne chaahiye.
  Pappu: Haan paapa, chalo main ne us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha he.

Santabanta Funny jokes in English and Hindi

Here is a collection of Santa Banta Jokes in English and Hindi. read and share to every people Very Funny sms.

 

Santabanta Funny jokes in English and Hindi

• Teacher: I want U to tell me the longest sentence U can think of.
  Paappu: Life imprisonment!
  Enjoy it

• Santa call to F.M Radio:- I have find out  wallet with Rs.20,000 of Mr.Rizwan
  RJ:- Sir U want to return it ? ?
  Santa::- Nahi re...I want to dedicate a sad song for him..

• Santa: Should I Buy Tickets For My Children.? ?
  Conductor: Yes! Only If They r Above eight.
  Santa: Thank God ,I Have Only six Children..!!
  Jeo Santa Jeo

• Saanta Caar ki Batteri change karwaane gaya.
  Mechanic: Saahab, "Exide" ki Daaal dUn?
  Santa: Nahin yaar,
  Dono side ki daaal de warna phir Problem ho gi.

• Santa was getting bite off  by mosquitoes the whole nit,
  He got irritated� Drank poison said, �ab kaaato saaalon, sub maro ge!� 

• Chain SMS by Santa:
  Is message ko itna forward karo ke meri girl friend tak pohach jaaye
  .
  .
  .
  "Prito tu ne sim change kar kay accha nahi kiya."

• Santa kay lips jale huye thay,
  Banta: Kese jale
  Santa: Wife ko railway astation drop krne gaya tha.
  Baanta: To?
  Santa: Khushi kay maare.
  Train kay engine ko choom liya :*
   
• Banta: Yaaar teri wife ki maut ka bada afsos hua, wese hua kiya tha?
  Sant: Goli lagi thi maathe mein.
  Banta: Allah ka shukar ker kay Aaankh bach gayi.

• Santa court main judge say:
  Aaaj tak meri itni insult nahi hoi,
  meri nai padson nay mujhe nahaate huye dekh lia he!
  Judge: to tum kiya chaahte ho?
  Santa: Badla.

Jokes on santa banta

Santa ki shaadi ke teen mahine baad hi beta ho giya.
Santa: Ye 3 mahine mein bacha kese ho giya?
Biwi: Aaap ki shaadi ko kitna time hua hy?
Santa: 3 maheene.
Biwi: Aur meri shaadi ko?
Santa: teen maheene.
Biwi: Aur bachcha kitne time baaad hua?
Santa: teen maheene baad.
Biwi: Total kitne maheene ho gaye?
Santa: Ohh teri vakai, 9 mahine ho gaye!
time ka pata hi nahi laga? :D

- - - ->

A man to Santa: Aaao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal main sports shoes pehen ker Aaaya.

- - - ->

Interviewer : suppose, in a closed roooom,
how can you get away if it caught fire?
Santa : very Simple, Stop imagining.
- - - ->
Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kiya arth hai?
Pappu: Tum so jaayo maan, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hun.

- - - ->

Santa Yaar Yeh Bata Is Duniya Mein Kitne Desh Hain
Banta Are Paagal Is Duniya Mein aik Hi To Desh Hain
Jis ka Naam India Hai
Baki To Sub Videsh Hain. :-)

Jokes of santa banta in hindi

Hum tumhen pyaaar krte hain itna,
Tum ko kiya pata kitna,
Baarish aggar hoti hy bahir,
Such kehta hun,
dekh lo paani ki boond hy jitna�
I Love you Cute Heart.

- - - ->

Aap ki Aankh say gehra he meri rooh ka zakham
Aap kia such sakien ge meri tanhaie ko
main tu dam toor raha tha magar afsurda hayaat
khud chali Aayi meri hawsala afzai ko
lazat-e-gham ke siwa teri nigaahon ke baghair
kon samjhta hy meri gham ki gehrai ko

 - - - ->

Milen ge milate rahen ge,
Dosti ki yaad dilaate rahen ge,
Taaj mehal to mehnga pade ga,
Mumtaaj banate rahenge.

- - - ->

Majbooriyo Ko Hum Aankho Mein Chupa Lete Hain,
Hum Kaha Rote Hain Halaat Rula Dete Hain,
Hum To Her Pal Yaad Krte Hain Aap ko,
Per Aap Yaad Na Karne Ka ilzaam Laga Dete Hain�

- - - ->

baadal kitne khush naseeb hain,,
door reh kar bhi jameen per baraste hai,
hum kitne bad naseeb hain,
paas reh kar bhi milne ko taraste hain...

Santa banta jokes hindi jokes

Laddy Doctor: Tum roz subah clinic kay bahir
khade ho ker auraton ko kiyon ghoorte ho?
Santa: Ji Aaap hi nay bahir likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay
9am to 12pm

- - - ->

santa apne father ke samne cigrate pee raha tha,
Logon ny kaha kay Aaap apne father ky samne cigratte pee rahay ho ?
Santa bola : Wo mera father he, koi petrol pump thodi.

- - - ->

Santa went out to buy an Indian flag.
The shopkeeper gave him the flag.
Guess what did he ask next...
Is main aur colour dikhaye.
Hahahahahahaha

- - - ->

Kidnaper : Teri b.v mere kabze mein hai,
Saboot ke taur per uski do ungliya bhijwa raha hun.
Santa : Saboot pakka nahi hai,
Mundi bhej mundi..

- - - ->

Santa: I have Been Sending an E-mails To William Shakespear�
Banta: William Shakespare Is Dead, foolish�
Santa: No Wonder He Hasn�t Replied As Well�

Santa banta sms jokes

Santa : pehle mein apni b.V ko B.A karwaun ga
fir M.A fir Ph.d karwaun ga phir badiya si naukri dilwaun ga.
Banta : phir acha sa rishta daikh ke us ki shaadi bhi krwa diyo

- - - ->

Santa Banta zid kar rahe si monkey dekhan di...
so tuhade ghar da address dita hai.
Yaar 2- 4 tapusian maar ke dikha deo bichaare khush ho jaaan gay.

- - - ->

Santa win an Eng quiz by writing the reverse word of:
Manchester United
Guess What he has written? ?.

- - - ->

Sardar ko sapne mein aik ladki ne chappal maari,
2 din tak sardar apne bank nahi gaya,
Qiyun ki bank mein likha tha..
�hum Aaap ke sapne ko hakeekat mein badalte hein�

- - - ->

Jailer: Fhaansi say pehle kis se milo ge?
Santa: B.V Say
Jailer: Maa-Baap se nahi
Santa: Maa-Baap to agla janam lete hi mil jyen ge
biwi ke liye sala phir 25 saal wait karna pade ga!! :d

Santa banta funny jokes

Santa ki Biwi nay use office jate waqt kaha
"See You in the evening!"
Santa gusse mein:"Main bhi tujhe dekh lunga kameeni!
Dhamki kis ko deti hai?

- - - ->

SANTA Ghar Ka Darwaaza Ukhaad Kay Kandhe Pay Rakh Ke Ja Raha Tha.
Kisi Ne Poochha: Oye Kahan Ja Rahe Ho?
SANTA:Chaabi kho gayi he Taala Khulwanay ja rha hun..

- - - ->

Wife bath room say naha kay nikli to Santa use ghoor raha tha!
Wife romantic ho kar:
Kuch karne ka iraada hai kiya?
Santa 2 thappad maar kay bola:
Mere garm paani say kiyu nahayi!!

- - - ->

Santa applied for the position of Mechanical Engineer.
In interview:
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrr�..
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrr dhup dhup dhup dhup�

- - - ->

santa banta were fighting after exaaaam.
Sir: why r you fighting? ??
santa : This fool left the answer sheeeet blank,
Sir: So what ? ? ? ?
santa: Even i did the like thing, now teacher will believe that we both copied.
if U like this jokes share to every fool People. hahahaha.

Santa and banta jokes in hindi

Banta aik sadhu say bola:
Baba, meri b.v baot preshaan krti hy,
koi upay batao.
Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to mein sadhu kiyun banta?

- - - ->

No body Can't beat this.
Santa Kabhi kabhi sochta hy ki.
Aggar mein "BORING" hun.
To fir,
Mere muh say paani kiyun nahi Aaata...!!:-D

 - - - ->

Santa apni girlfrend ke saath first date pe :
Ye meri pehli date hy darling
aggar koi galti ya kami reh jaaye to chhota bhai samajh ke maaf kar dena.

- - - ->

Bus Accident
Man Crying: Mera haath kat gaya.
Bahot dard ho raha hay.
Santa: Abey chup beth.
Wo dekh uska gala kat gaya,
Fir bhi chup-chaaap pada hai..!!

- - - ->

Santa: Today is Sunday I wanna enjoy,
so I bought three movie tickets
Jeeto: Why three?
Santa: For you and your parents.s

Santa banta hindi jokes

Santa Sharaab Pee ker,
Sadhu Se Takra Giya,
Sadhoo Gusse Main Aaye Murkh
Main Tujhe SHRAAP Deta Hun
Santa-Rukiye Maharaaaj
Mein Glaass Le kay Aaata hun.

- - - ->

Santa: Agar narilyaaal kay ped pe chad jaun to..
engineering college ki ladkiyan dikh jaaye gi
Banta: Phir haath chod dena,
to medical college ki bhi dikh jaayen gi.

- - - ->

Banta: Ye chaaku kiyo ubaaaal rahe ho? ? ?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye,
Banta: To phir ubaaalne ki kiya zarurat hy ?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaaaye

- - - ->

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except our Santaaji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"
hahahhaahahaha
If you like this please share to every one.